But I’m not photogenic.

Have you said it? Thought it? Believed it?

“I’ve wanted to get family photos for a long time, but…”

The sentence is finished with many things…

But we just haven’t done it. But I want to lose weight first. But we are waiting for fall. But we are waiting for spring. But I don’t know what to wear. But we never have time. But we just don’t look like those families. But we aren’t photogenic. But I’m not photogenic.

This is a conversation I have a lot. Like… a lot a lot.

I get it. I’ve been on the other side of the camera many times, and it’s a strange feeling to know you’re being seen and captured in all of your you-ness. You want it, of course, to be lovely. Not to mention you’re making an investment, and no one wants junk pictures of themselves, amirite?

The definition of photogenic: looking attractive in photographs or on film.

The definition of attractive: appealing to look at.

I can tell you with certainty, every family is photogenic. The reason I say this is because I wholly believe that connection is attractive. And, in my humble opinion, family photos should focus on connection.

Clothing, hair, weight, wrinkles… it’s in our nature to concern ourselves with appearance. We are told to do so on a daily basis. But if I’m doing my job well, the viewer will barely notice what you’re wearing in your photos, let alone whether you dyed your roots or wore the right shade of nail polish. (Spoiler: I’m likely not your gal if you want family fashion photography.)

The viewer will be focused on what’s happening. The mood, the motion, the emotion, the touch, the connection. The viewer will notice the wonder in your youngest child’s face as they twirl, the furrowed brow of a toddler trying to take their shoes off, the surprise of a parent being splashed in the creek, the love in your eye as you give your partner a hug, the joy of a family falling over laughing together as their dog rushes the photographer to steal the sunglasses off her head. I’m lookin’ at you, Scully fam.

It’s not all about the clothes or the setting, though I’ll help with both of those things. It’s about your willingness to show up as you. To connect. To spend time together, be in the moment, and to let me be there to capture it for you. That’s where the magic is. Just give it a try. You won’t regret it.

(Another lovely photo by rachel joy barehl, and one of my favorites… my kids were wearing swim trunks under their sweatpants and that tee shirt I’m wearing is at least five years old and dirty. But their smiles and their faces are where it’s at.)